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vita merfen to the rescue!




vita-merfen
as i discovered a new mark on my face this morning, i reached for my old faithful vita merfen cream and reflected on it's wonderful power....i came to this conclusion. vita merfen is like duct tape. this cream could end terrorism, it has the power to heal and unite countries. it can bring healing to families and loved ones
how???
vita merfen. is a swiss product, can't read the package, instruction, ingredients or directions...but i have used it for everything and anything for the past 7 years. i buy it in bulk, stock it away and have at least 1 tube in every room of my house...
i have used it for...
have a burn? vita merfen!
tooth ache??? vita merfen!
have a zit! vita merfen over night with a bandaged. sure, you look like a utter tool but in the morning you can squeeze that sucker or better! it's gone!
nasty scabs! vita to the rescue!
weird rashes? vita!
a freaky marky blister thingy???vita!!!
runners burn? chaffing? vita!!
refuse to go to the dr to get a freaky looking something checked out? not that i have ever done that! vita will cure it!
tummy ache? teeth pain? vita! sure they say that you would not eat it, but who are "they" really? and what do "they" know? vita baby!
in grown toe nail? vita, vita, vita!
it's the end all, cure all, in a tube!
vita, i adore you and your power...
bawahh this post was totally for you chris....oh how i mocked you, teased you and tormented you with making funness of you and your "vita merten is the best" ness
and now in secret i share the same adoration
shhhhhh

17 comments:

Shannon said...

I find this funny because it reminds me of our great love for cow-sab from the farm... farmer's put it on the cow's teets when they're cracked from milking. It does wonders for just about any abrasion on the skin and heals things 1,000,000 times faster than polysporin!

ps) Happy birthday in six hours :)

Crystal said...

I remember that cream! I grabbed it at the super cool pharmacy in Switzerland. It did wonders for my eczema. I am so stealing some when I come up next time...

Make It Happen Mama said...

My Dad is from Switzerland, so we were raised on this stuff. My husband and son are now converts of the Vita-Merfen cult! Any tips on where I can purchase online? We live in Texas now and I'm almost done with my last tube. Panic!!!

Anonymous said...

I find it really irresponsible to recommend a product, and tout that you use it "for everything and anything"... and in the same breath admit that you can't read the instructions (which are presumably in french, german, and italian). Any medication should be used according to the instructions: there are indications and counter-indications, for example whether it's ok to use it on mucous membrane areas or not, how often it can be used, whether it's ok to use it when pregnant. By the way, I found your page exactly because I was searching for the instructions for this... to know whether I can use it on my 3 year old, and whether it's ok to use it on the lips. I see you also have a child. Please be more prudent!

Chris Eigenheer said...

Bawwwhhh...this is too funny. i just realized that this page is number one on google for "vita-merfen". What cracks me up is that some people don't know how to read slight sarcasm in a blog post and they also don't know that I (Melanie's husband) is from switzerland and CAN read the instructions and DOES know how and when to apply it properly...seriously, people! chill!

Anonymous said...

Hello,

I discovered Vita Merfen several years ago and swear by for just about everything. My problem is that I live in Canada and can't find it anywhere here. My old boss was from Switzerland and he would bring it for me. Do you know of anywhere in the US or Canada where it is available for purchase? Thank you so much for any help you can give me.

Anonymous said...

Hello....I,m from Canada and would like to get some vita merfen where would I buy some?????

eat love and play said...

Hi! I am in the states and Vita Merfen was recommended to me. I am having a hard time buying it online. Any tips of where I find it? Thanks so much! Oh, And i got your humor in your post. It was very cute.

Jus said...

what Eat Love and Play said :)

Anonymous said...

Whenever I'm in Switzerland, I buy Vita-Merfen, but I'm from Denmark and don't go so often. My last tube is too old now. So... I join the chorus asking: Where can you buy it on-line????

Sir Rudiger said...

To all of you wondering about how to order this near-miraculous substance called vita merfen, the powers of two brothers are forging an international alliance to seek a solution to this problem. To clarify, one of us is hubby of blog lady and lives in Canada, the other lives in Switzerland. There must be a way to overcome this obstacle. I call it the "axis of vita"...

stand by for more infos

Crystal said...

Please place an order for 1 tube of Vita Merfen. I can pick it up in your town next time I am there.
Please advise me of the total cost of this item.
Thanks

Anonymous said...

I have been using Vita Merfen since I am 17, Now I am 53 years old and my face does not even have a wrinkle. This cream is rich in vitamin A and fish oil. They used to sale it in Honduras but not anymore.
RS.

Kate Tabachnik said...

Please add me to the list of people whom you will purchase for once you're in Switzerland. I'll take 2 (how often do you go there?)

Kate

Chris Eigenheer said...

The cranky lady on the forth comment needs to stop being such a Hillary Clinton and suck it up. Its a joke no brained dum dum. I am Melines son nate and you should be ashamed of yourself for cluttering this blog with you meannis.
2019.

vitacare said...

My last tube is too old now. Can I buy one online? Is there any store to buy online?

MG-FITNESS said...

WHERE CAN YOU FIND IT?? I've looked EVERYWHERE in stores and online and no where to be found! The only place I found it was in actuall Swiss pharmecy and they dont ship anywhere. I think they stopped manufacturing. PLEASE SHARE IF YOU KNOW WHERE CAN I GET THIS MIRACLE CREME!!